COFFEE ADDICTION!!!!!!!!!!

Top 10 Signs You're Addicted to Caffeine
From The Late Show with David Letterman


10. Haven't slept since the Johnson Administration.
9. Your next-door neighbors often call to complain about the sound of your chattering teeth.
8. Instead of Tic Tacs, you suck on No-Doz.
7. You named your twins "Cappuccino" and "Espresso."
6. On the way to work you get pulled over for speeding and you don't even have your car.
5. You kill a guy for trying to switch your regular coffee with Folgers Crystals.
4. You wake up in middle of night screaming "Pepsi! For the love of God, I need Pepsi!"
3. When a Maxwell House commercial comes on, you actually lick the TV screen.
2. You drink so much coffee it starts shooting out your ears like our stage manager
Biff Henderson (videotape of Henderson spitting coffee out of ears).
1. You're shaking like Michael Jackson on his wedding night.


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Top 10 Signs You're Addicted to Caffeine

Too Much Coffee, Man ? Top 16 Proof-Positive Signs
16. You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.
15. You'd be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison.
14. When someone asks, "How are you?" you say, "Good to the last drop."
13. People can test their batteries in your ears.
12. People get dizzy just watching you.
11. All your kids are named Joe.
10. You can type sixty words a minute . . . with your feet.
9. Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
8. You lick your coffee pot clean.
7. The only time you're standing still is in an earthquake.
6. You have to watch videos in fast-forward.
5. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
4. You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.
3. You sleep with your eyes open.
2. You answer the door before people knock.
1. Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.